THE SIZE OF A MAN

I love the space here in our new home in California. When I stand outside behind our house, I can see for miles. I see mountains a few miles to the east and to the south the long deep valley opens up the view. Who could ask for more.

Our house in Connecticut—a traditional and beautiful Cape Cod style—made me feel closed in because there was no view farther than a few hundred feet. We had beautiful trees all over the property including a line of tall white pines to the east. The trees were beautiful but they closed things in. Living there made me feel a kind of "pinch" you feel when you’re too closed in.

But living in Connecticut was better than living in New York City where our first domicile was the ground floor of a brownstone—actually four steps down from street level. Talk about feeling closed in! Our garden in back was closed in on all sides by walls. The garden faced a school yard, directly behind us, with a wall of 50 or 60 feet. All these walls had the powerful effect of making me feel "boxed in." No wonder everybody who can afford to, leaves the city on weekends. And where to New Yorkers go? To the shore of Long Island, to the Adirondack Mountains and places like that—where they can feel a sense of space. It’s a survival mechanism.

Here in California when I’m feeling boxed in, I walk out onto the deck, sit in a deck chair and look out—far away.

This feeling of space equates with a feeling of healing the soul. To look up into a huge sky, to stare across the vineyards into the distance. Maybe that’s the key word—distance.

We human beings are physically of a certain size. But our minds, connected with our bodies, are unbounded, unlimited. I, for one, need to experience this feeling of size. It helps me to know how big I really am!