FANCY AIR-CONDITIONING BOY IN BAGHDAD

I never expected my trip to Baghdad to be so much fun. The three AmeriCares humanitarian aid workers I traveled with—could be at times, hilarious. Our group consisted of John Connell, Logistics Specialist, Peter Tokarczyk, Director of Disaster Services and Randy Weiss, a Product Manager. During the day we were joined by our translator, an Iraqi-American Doctor from Cleveland Rafal Badri, who had grown up in Baghdad.

Following the military’s example, we traveled in two cars wherever we went—a Chevy Suburban with dark tinted windows and a beautifully preserved white 1988 Chevrolet Caprice Classic. The driving was hair-raising. Baghdad traffic was a free-for-all with no traffic lights and no traffic cops.

After visiting the hospitals and traveling around the dusty and hot city during the days, we’d return to our dusty and hot rooms in our small six-story hotel at night. The small amount of electricity provided by a generator frequently cut off unexpectedly, often trapping someone in the hotel’s tiny elevator. We found it sensible to walk up the stairs to our rooms, all on the fifth floor.

After taking a shower under a mere trickle of water, we’d congregate for cold drinks in Randy Weiss’s room, inexplicably the only cool spot in the hotel. We never learned why Randy’s room was the only one provided with air conditioning; but a lot of things about Baghdad were inexplicable, so we didn’t really try to understand the understandable.

John Connell came up with a nickname for Randy, "Fancy Air-conditioning Boy" which none of us, in the spirit of good-natured fun, let him forget. We constantly rubbed in the fact that Randy was the only one basking in a cool 70 degrees or so while the rest of us attempted to get some sleep at night on sweaty sheets with our doors and windows open hoping to capture a few puffs of cool breeze; kept awake by the loud roars of tanks passing on the streets below every twenty minutes or so.

FANCY AIR-CONDITIONING BOY

When Randy emailed me a New Year’s greeting, I was instantly reminded of what he put us all through—especially me. I mean, after all, I was AmeriCare’s invited guest; so shouldn’t he, out of politeness, have at least offered me the room?

I want to let it be known I am only joking here. Randy was truly only a selfless and good-natured bloke during the whole trip. He handed out cute little cartoon character stickers to children wherever we went. And, after all, he was the one who lugged around our three very heavy bulletproof vests, which we never wore. Come to think of it, I think Randy earned the cool room. But with that, he’ll just have to put up with the title "Fancy Air-conditioning Boy."