SOBRIETY

In the middle of moving my family from the East Coast to the West Coast, at times, I become overwhelmed by the amount of details I must deal with. My wife and kids have been out West now for over a month and my full time job has been first to sell our house—thank God for His speedy sail—and pack it up.

Never, ever in my wildest imagining could I have pictured just how many objects four people could gather in 22 years, which is how long my wife and I have been together. It seems that all four of us (our two sons included) are collectors. Mostly of things which have no value to anyone else but us or to the individual collector. Rocks are a big part of what we are moving. Rocks mostly that originated in California, funnily enough, which means they were packed up from various summer trips and brought back in luggage.

The moving companies charge by weight so our bill is going to be interesting I’m sure. But, although computer junk and toys and books are expendable, rocks are not. Not to by wife or my kids—or me for that matter. Today, on the phone my wife wanted to make sure I didn’t overlook the rock with the shell attached. "Where would I find it?" I asked. "On the brown table in the living room," she told me. "Not the one on the front step with the shell shape in the rock—the fossil?" "No, this is the one with the shell attached!" She was getting impatient that I didn’t instantly recall this rock. "Found it! It was in a basket on the dining room table."

But what I am writing about here, is not about moving, and certainly not about rocks—it’s about sobriety.

I keep realizing during various moments of clarity in this overwhelming process that my ability to do my part in all of this is purely because more than a decade ago I was given a reprieve from my obsession for alcohol. If I was still drinking, I’d be totally useless. But, instead, God has given me back my life. He has given me a life wildly beautiful and fulfilling. I have the most wonderful wife and children—all of them filled with love. Even Dixie the dog is a wonder.

And me, well, I’m an imperfect being. But a being saved from destruction by a force more powerful than himself. I’ve been given a second chance and by the Grace of God, allowed to continue on this great spiritual journey.

I fully recognize that dealing with my alcoholism has been one of the most profound aspects of the journey. I had gone to work for Maharishi, lived a monastic life in Switzerland, made a pilgrimage to India but still... I was an alcoholic! Being an alcoholic was a separate issue but until I dealt with it, any other issues I had were buried beneath it. Alcoholism was the fog which obscured all the other aspects of my life. And until my Higher Power came to me like a fresh breeze and blew the fog away I was lost.

Thank God for my clarity!